Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Haha...it has really been a long long long time since the last time i updated my blog... the reason why i took such a long time to update is because i've accumulated far too many things for me to say... that's why i'll update slowly, forgettin some things in the process so that i won't have to update so much... hai... anyway dun think there's anything worth updating about... so many things have happened to me, mostly bad... n these r memories that i would choose to forget... but then without unhappy stuff, how would we know we r truly happy when happy things happen?
Hai... My mood now is bad n terrible... it isn't because of anyone... guess it's just the gods tryin to play a harsh joke on me... n this joke is so bad that i really can't take it... it is almost like a dream that i can't wake up from... this joke began all the way bout a month ago on the 10th feb 2006... it was a day that was highly anticipated... it should have been a day when everybody would celebrate...but guess it turned out to be a day when most would grief... a grief that is unforgettable n painful... it was the release of the 2005 O'levels results...
we already heard news on our way to sch from the JCs we were posted to in our first 3 months... news that were greatly negative... while some others were happy their sch had done well, all we could do was to not believe in the news that's circulatin, n continue to believe in ourselves... however, as we finally stepped into the sch hall that we once had many memories, great n lousy, we were to experience the worst memory we would all have in that hall where we once dwelled... OUr sch did not perform as well in the o'levels as expected.. in fact, we performed far worse... WORST... hai... i got 10 for my L1R5... it was definitely a disappointin score, n i cried, but nevertheless, i was contented as i was better than many that were far worse... but it was not a feelin that if i were given a choice, ever to experience again... to see the principal showin us a black face, as well as the stories n happenings that followed this incident, it was almost like a torture to know wat is happenin to ur alma mater because of wat u n ur batch of fellow sch mates have done... guess we really have to blame ourselves for wat had happened to us... with some time, i eventually got over this... but never once did i forget...
However, another blow was to happen to me after i recovered from one.. it was the about 1 month away from the previous blow.. one which till now, i'm still feelin bad about... one that i know i haven't recoverd yet... it was the 3rd of march... the release of our JAE postin results... despite the failure i faced at the o's, i was still expectin that amongst all that had taken place, i might still be given a chance to remain at the college that i've bonded n developed a loyalty n belongin towards the sch... however, the joke hasn't ended... we reap wat we sow... perhaps this is really wat happened to me... i wasn't able to stay at NJC... instead, i was posted to a sch that if given a chance, i would never have chose that sch... it is indeed a sch that made me appreciate more the sch i was in before...i won't name this sch as i would offend the sch, n i still want to respect this new sch even though i dun like it... when i first got posted to this sch, i still harboured hopes of returnin to my previous college... but then as days passed, n now things have more or less settled, i guess my chances r as small as a pea...but i'm still hopin, but i dun hope for much...i'm just prepared for the worst i guess, or m i just afraid that the more i hope, the greater i would fall? I'm prayin... prayin very hard for just that little chance... even that little chance for me to return... now i realise just how much i really love NJC... in the beginnin, i even thought i would change sch if my results turn out to be better... but then if given a choice now, i would have chose to stay even if i've gotten all the A1s...
Haha... thought i might not have a chance to stay at NJC ever again, but in the time that i was there, i've had some of the best experiences that i would ever get... these r some of the memories that belongs to only my class, n these r definitely memories that i won't ever forget... haha... there's so many ppl that i've developed a new impression towards... ppl that i've eventually learned to appreciate n see their good sides... Thanks 06S11...
-To Liyuan:Haha... u think i'll forget bout u ah.. haha... no lah... i want to thank u too for bein with me throught tough times too...
3/08/2006 05:48:00 pm
